Feel The Wave

Where you begin your personal growth journey.

Tag: self-reflection

  • What Really Matters to You?

    What Really Matters to You?

    We are unique individuals with different experiences, and our wants and needs differ from one another. We certainly have things in common with others at the macro level, but we are different at the micro level. Those differences are what make the world we live in such a beautiful place.

    With that said, what we value differs. But in most cases, some of the small things we do every day can be eliminated.

    We check social media to see what everyone did or is doing. We watch the evening news or scroll through media pages online during lunch. They are energy suckers.

    We spend so much time looking at what’s going on in other people’s lives and what is happening around the world that we forget to live our own.

    What happens then?

    The family text goes unanswered. The garage gets cluttered. Small repairs around the house start to pile up. We don’t realize what we’ve done to ourselves because we haven’t given ourselves time to process it.

    We are consumed by the volume of information. The overwhelming feeling transfers to all the tasks we need to complete in our lives. So we shut down and go to what’s easy: social media.

    We end up on autopilot, going through life. We don’t have a moment to breathe and think about what we truly want to do. We’ve been in this cycle for so long that we think this is normal.

    Take a Moment to Reflect

    We need to take moments throughout our days to reflect on what we did, what was good for us, and what wasn’t.

    There are many things we do throughout our day that are meaningful to us, but we do them habitually because we haven’t stopped to think about them.

    Take the time to think about what really matters to you.

    Are those things part of your day-to-day life? If not, what can be exchanged for them?

    We have limited time in a day, and we certainly don’t want to add more. We need to replace some things with others.

    Make it a habit to do a mental cleanup every couple of weeks. Write down your life inventory to make it visible and accessible. Put it somewhere you can see it every morning.

    This will help ensure you’re doing the things you’re committed to. The things that bring you joy.

    Don’t wait until the new year, your birthday, or spring to clean things up. Remind yourself of the things that matter to you and incorporate them into your life.

    Don’t get sucked into the cycle of mindless scrolling and news watching.

    Clean the clutter from your mind.

    Get your peace of mind back.

    Take care.

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  • Get to Know Yourself Through Introspection

    Get to Know Yourself Through Introspection

    We live in a world filled with constant noise. From the moment we wake up until we go to bed, something is demanding our attention. Social media, emails, television and endless notifications leave very little room for one simple but essential activity—thinking. We may feel productive because we’re always doing something, but in reality, we’re often just running in place.

    Social media has taken much of our free time hostage. Our minds are constantly being bombarded with information, leaving little opportunity to process our own thoughts. Our brains aren’t designed for a constant stream of input, especially from the artificial light and endless stimulation produced by smartphones, televisions and computer screens. Over time, this can leave us feeling mentally exhausted and disconnected from ourselves.

    Taking time to think—not just about life, but about yourself—is one of the best ways to discover who you truly are. It helps you understand what you enjoy, what gives you energy and what matters most to you. Many people go years without ever taking the time to get to know themselves. Instead, they allow family, friends and even strangers online to influence who they should be. Eventually, they look in the mirror and struggle to recognize the person staring back at them.

    This is where introspection becomes so valuable. Introspection is the process of examining your own thoughts, emotions and experiences with honesty and curiosity. It allows you to step back from the noise of everyday life and better understand what’s happening within you.

    One of the simplest ways to practice introspection is by writing. Writing slows your thinking down. Thoughts that feel scattered in your mind often become much clearer once they’re written on paper. Set aside just two to five minutes each morning and write whatever comes to mind. Don’t worry if it doesn’t make sense at first. Read it back, reflect on it and continue writing. As you practice, you’ll notice your thoughts becoming clearer and your ability to express them improving. Like any skill, learning to put your thoughts into words takes time and repetition. Taking time to write your thoughts not only improves self-awareness but can also strengthen your memory over time.

    As you become more intentional with introspection, you naturally develop greater self-awareness. Self-awareness is the ability to understand yourself and recognize your thoughts, emotions and behaviours. The better you know yourself, the more confident you’ll become in your decisions. Rather than reacting to life, you’ll begin responding with purpose and intention. This sense of clarity often leads to greater peace of mind and improved mental well-being.

    Knowing what you want also makes it easier to recognize what you don’t want. You begin making choices that align with your values instead of simply following expectations or outside influences. People who understand themselves tend to feel more content because their decisions reflect who they truly are rather than who others expect them to be.

    You can’t truly know yourself without asking meaningful questions and taking the time to reflect on the answers. Through introspection and writing, you gain a deeper understanding of what you love, what challenges you and what kind of life you want to build. That understanding becomes the foundation for making decisions that align with your values and bring greater fulfillment.

    Take a few minutes each day to slow down, reflect and write. The better you know yourself, the more intentionally you’ll live.

    Take care.

  • Why Knowing Yourself Matters

    Why Knowing Yourself Matters

    Look at yourself in the mirror. What do you see?

    Most of us don’t spend much time analyzing and judging ourselves the way we analyze and judge others. We usually don’t because we believe we already know ourselves inside and out. For the most part, we look in the mirror to identify external flaws. We check whether our hair looks right, our face is clean, and our clothes fit properly.

    But how often do you look inward and examine your thoughts, actions, and habits?

    If your answer was anything other than “often,” it may be time to spend more time reflecting on who you are. We rarely examine our thoughts because we’re convinced we already know the answers. Or we’re afraid of what we might find. Either way, not truly knowing yourself can lead to frustration and uncertainty in your abilities.

    That frustration and uncertainty often show up in how we judge others. We may project our insecurities onto the people around us. We wonder how someone could be so naive or so foolish. We question their decisions and criticize their actions. Yet we rarely apply the same level of scrutiny to ourselves.

    Self-examination is uncomfortable. It’s much easier to identify what everyone else is doing wrong than it is to acknowledge our own shortcomings. We turn a blind eye to our mistakes and avoid confronting the insecurities we’d rather not face.

    Eventually, a part of you will begin asking deeper questions and pulling you toward self-discovery. If you don’t truly know yourself, there will always be unanswered questions lingering in your subconscious. Although they’re there, most of us ignore them until we begin to feel them tugging at us from deep within.

    It’s like looking into a dusty mirror. You can see yourself, but the reflection is blurred. Taking time to think about what you want, what you value, and what you love slowly wipes away the dust. The clearer the mirror becomes, the clearer your understanding of yourself becomes. And the more often you do it, the easier it is to recognize the person staring back at you.

    Once you recognize yourself, you’ll be less tempted to judge others. You’ll become comfortable with who you are, and instead of criticizing, you’ll seek to understand. Your view of the world will change, and you’ll begin to discover more about the people and opportunities around you. You may find possibilities you once believed were meant for others, or opportunities you never noticed at all. As your perspective expands, the world becomes much bigger than you ever imagined.

    Knowing yourself doesn’t just reveal who you are; it opens the door to endless possibilities. The clearer you see yourself, the more clearly you’ll see the world around you.

    Take care.

  • When Everything Feels Right But You Don’t

    The conditions to start your day are perfect. You got a good night’s sleep, your morning shower is warm, the sun is shining, the coffee is brewing, and you’re not rushed to get anywhere. You couldn’t have planned a better start to your day.

    But something feels off. Despite the perfect morning, a heaviness lingers. There’s a weight on your shoulders you can’t shake. What’s going on? Sometimes the world outside is calm and bright, but inside, there are raging rapids trying to break free. These are the complexities of our emotions.

    You go to an event with friends, smiling as if nothing’s wrong, but internally you’re a volcano ready to erupt. You reach this point because you can’t quite express what’s going on inside. How could you, when even you don’t fully understand it? And if you’re honest, that’s not the only reason. You worry that others won’t understand—that they’ll think you’re strange, laugh at you, or turn away.

    But any internal turmoil has an expiration date, whether you like it or not. If you don’t release it in a healthy way, it will find its own way out. The good news is there are ways to let that chaos go—and it all starts with you.

    The first step is sharing your thoughts with yourself. Write them down, or speak them aloud in front of a mirror. At first, your feelings may seem unclear, but with time, you’ll begin to articulate what’s really going on and why. Eventually, you’ll feel ready to share with someone else. Start simple and general to see how it feels and gauge how the person reacts. Most likely, the person you choose will listen—and that alone will lift a weight from your shoulders.

    You can also express yourself by saying something as simple as, “I’m not feeling well today. I don’t know why, but I’m not 100%.” Writing can also help you process emotions, recognize triggers, and notice behavioural patterns. Over time, you’ll learn how to avoid situations that unsettle you.

    “Practice makes perfect,” as the saying goes—but no one is perfect. We’re all practicing something to get better, and that includes expressing ourselves. Some days, your words will flow easily; other days, they won’t. The important thing is that you tried.

    Remember, you’re not alone in feeling this way. Even if others don’t fully understand what you’re going through, they’ll know that you’re not okay and will likely listen. Express yourself kindly, and people will open their hearts.

    Be courageous.

    Take care.

  • Forgiveness: A Path to Emotional Freedom

    In this life we get hurt, disappointed and heartbroken. It’s part of the human experience. There is also the opposite of these feelings such as joy, pleasantness and love. Without an opposite feeling we wouldn’t be able to explain what the emotion brings within us. If you haven’t felt or running away from the common emotions of being human such as sadness, joy and love than you are denying being human and that is not a great feeling!

    Realize that all humans are flawed and no one is perfect on this earth. Most of us have been on the receiving end or on the giving end of heartbreak. Depending on our experiences, we handle it in different ways. Whatever the experience, it does not mean the person giving it can take it or vice versa. Heartbreak is heartbreak, and if you are hurt or betrayed lean into the feeling. Explore it. Do not swat it away. Sigmund Freud explained it well when he said, “unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.”

    It’s important not to repeat the hurt you fell onto others or to the person who hurt you. Marcus Aurelius said, “the best revenge for these kinds of things was to not be like that, to not be like the people who had done such a thing.” When writing about people who betray or hurt him.

    Of course this is easier said than done. You feel pain, the body is trembling and telling you need to release it somehow. The easiest way to do that is to bring hurt to the person who hurt you. Ask yourself , how will you feel afterwards. Possibly better for a brief period but longterm you will feel worse that you did initially. You will realize the outburst did not help you and at the same time, you hurt someone.

    There is no magical quick fix to relieve your broken heart or to remove the anger you feel. It takes time. It takes work. A lot of work with yourself to get over the pain. It takes forgiveness. Again, easier said than done because it’s difficult to forgive someone who hurt you and betrayed you.

    Betrayal is painful because its a violation of trust. We can feel embarrassed, humiliated, sad and angry. To mend any relationship when there is betrayal, there needs to be accountability and that’s hard to come by with the ego present. If that does not happen, as someone who was betrayed, there is a way to move past it and that is with forgiveness.

    Forgiveness frees you from the control of the individual who harmed you. When we forgive, we let space for understanding and compassion by removing the matter that occupied your mind based on anger, depression or embarrassment. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting what happened. Harm was done and that is inexcusable. But in some cases, the person who harmed you will not take responsibility. Instead of wasting your time trying to convince them they hurt you, forgiving them releases you from their grip so you can move on.

    If you were betrayed and are still focused on the person who harmed you, ask yourself why that is? You have the control to stay or go. You have the choice to seek revenge or to seek forgiveness.

    Take care.     

  • 7 Ways I Feel Good About Myself and How You Can Too

    7 Ways I Feel Good About Myself and How You Can Too

    Feeling good about yourself isn’t about accolades or recognition—it’s about the little habits and choices you make every day.

    I spend eight hours a day in a work environment, and one thing that matters to me is arriving early to meetings and finishing them on time. I value my time and the time of others. This shows respect—for myself and my colleagues. I also respect them by supporting their work and giving my full attention when they present. When I am of service to others and fully invested, I feel good about myself.

    I give 100% to everything I do. If I can’t, that’s a signal I’m doing too much and need to reprioritize my objectives. Being all in on a project is gratifying, no matter my role—whether I’m leading, formatting, or simply writing the introduction. It doesn’t matter if no one notices or praises my work. What matters is knowing I gave my best. That’s success for me, and it makes me feel good about myself.

    I try to see life with the glass half full. I’m optimistic. I’m positive. Not everything will go according to plan, and sometimes things go terribly wrong—and that’s okay. That’s life. I learn from setbacks by asking how they could be avoided in the future. I don’t dwell on problems; I look for solutions. I ask myself, “Can I do something about this?” If not, I move on. If yes, I act. Learning from mistakes and moving forward makes me feel good about myself.

    I also practice gratitude. Every day, I set a reminder to ask myself what I’m grateful for. This keeps my life in perspective, adds positivity, and reminds me of what truly matters. Being grateful for what I already have makes me feel good about myself.

    I have passion for my work. I’m excited about what I do and enjoy using my imagination to create. Of course, there are tasks I don’t enjoy, but they’re minimal and manageable. Focusing on the work that excites me makes me feel good about myself.

    Finally, I listen to feedback. I don’t know everything, and I don’t want to. I love learning and improving. I welcome feedback with humility, listen carefully, and ask questions for clarity. Striving to be better than I was yesterday begins with accepting others’ perspectives. Listening, learning, and growing every day makes me feel good about myself.

    There are many ways to feel good about yourself. These are mine. What are yours?

    Take care.