Feel The Wave

Where you begin your personal growth journey.

Tag: emotional awareness

  • Forgiveness: A Path to Emotional Freedom

    In this life we get hurt, disappointed and heartbroken. It’s part of the human experience. There is also the opposite of these feelings such as joy, pleasantness and love. Without an opposite feeling we wouldn’t be able to explain what the emotion brings within us. If you haven’t felt or running away from the common emotions of being human such as sadness, joy and love than you are denying being human and that is not a great feeling!

    Realize that all humans are flawed and no one is perfect on this earth. Most of us have been on the receiving end or on the giving end of heartbreak. Depending on our experiences, we handle it in different ways. Whatever the experience, it does not mean the person giving it can take it or vice versa. Heartbreak is heartbreak, and if you are hurt or betrayed lean into the feeling. Explore it. Do not swat it away. Sigmund Freud explained it well when he said, “unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.”

    It’s important not to repeat the hurt you fell onto others or to the person who hurt you. Marcus Aurelius said, “the best revenge for these kinds of things was to not be like that, to not be like the people who had done such a thing.” When writing about people who betray or hurt him.

    Of course this is easier said than done. You feel pain, the body is trembling and telling you need to release it somehow. The easiest way to do that is to bring hurt to the person who hurt you. Ask yourself , how will you feel afterwards. Possibly better for a brief period but longterm you will feel worse that you did initially. You will realize the outburst did not help you and at the same time, you hurt someone.

    There is no magical quick fix to relieve your broken heart or to remove the anger you feel. It takes time. It takes work. A lot of work with yourself to get over the pain. It takes forgiveness. Again, easier said than done because it’s difficult to forgive someone who hurt you and betrayed you.

    Betrayal is painful because its a violation of trust. We can feel embarrassed, humiliated, sad and angry. To mend any relationship when there is betrayal, there needs to be accountability and that’s hard to come by with the ego present. If that does not happen, as someone who was betrayed, there is a way to move past it and that is with forgiveness.

    Forgiveness frees you from the control of the individual who harmed you. When we forgive, we let space for understanding and compassion by removing the matter that occupied your mind based on anger, depression or embarrassment. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting what happened. Harm was done and that is inexcusable. But in some cases, the person who harmed you will not take responsibility. Instead of wasting your time trying to convince them they hurt you, forgiving them releases you from their grip so you can move on.

    If you were betrayed and are still focused on the person who harmed you, ask yourself why that is? You have the control to stay or go. You have the choice to seek revenge or to seek forgiveness.

    Take care.     

  • What Do You Really Control? How to Improve Any Situation With Simple Actions

    We all want to feel helpful, appreciated, and connected. But in a world where so much is outside of our influence, it’s easy to forget that what we truly control is surprisingly simple: our actions, our attitude, and the way we show up for others. When we focus on those things, even the smallest interactions can leave a lasting impact.

    It feels good to help someone—and equally good when someone helps us. These moments of exchange matter, and we should appreciate them. In any situation, we can choose to leave things better than they were when we arrived.

    If a moment is already going well, ask yourself how you can make it even better. This doesn’t mean trying to one-up others or seeking attention. Instead, focus on improving one person’s experience. Maybe it’s starting a conversation with a stranger, showing curiosity, and learning something new from someone you’ve never met. Opening the door to new perspectives enriches us, and they’ll appreciate your genuine interest.

    You’ll often walk away feeling fulfilled because you met someone new and learned something meaningful. The other person will walk away feeling valued because someone truly listened. It’s a simple win-win.

    On the other hand, when a situation becomes awkward, shifting the energy—changing the topic, offering a drink, or introducing something lighthearted—can instantly reset the mood. Sometimes all it takes is a small spark to get things going again. But not every situation can be fixed. Once things reach a point of no return, the best thing you can do is step away. Time softens the intensity of the moment.

    You must accept that you can’t fix everything. Some situations are simply out of your control, and recognizing that truth is freeing. You can’t spend your life trying to repair other people or force situations to go a certain way. When something can’t be improved, it’s okay to move on. Turn the page.

    Ryan Holiday reminds us to “concentrate on what you have to do. Fix your eyes on it. Remind yourself that your task is to be a good human being.”

    That is the core of what we control.

    People gravitate toward those who are comfortable with themselves and who genuinely care about others. That kind of presence makes everyone better—including you. So wherever you go, don’t hesitate to leave it better than you found it.

    Take care.