It’s easy to be on our best behaviour when everyone is watching. We don’t want to be judged, so we change how we act. We wear a mask to hide who we really are. I’m not talking about being shy or nervous in crowds. I’m talking about something deeper.
This is about the people who seem to have it all together in public but unravel when they’re alone. The ones who cut corners when no one is watching, just to make themselves look better than they really are.
When you see someone do something questionable—even something small—you can’t help but wonder what else they do when the spotlight’s off. Imagine you’re out for an early morning walk and a car blows through a stop sign. You ask yourself: Did they just not see it, or do they always do this because no one’s around and it saves them a few seconds?
It makes you question their character. If they’ll run a stop sign when no one is watching, what else will they do? We all have our little quirks when no one’s around—picking our nose, double-dipping a carrot stick, sneaking an extra cookie. Those things are harmless. But what about the bigger things? The shortcuts that save time or make us look good but come at the cost of honesty?
The truth is, cutting corners might feel convenient now, but it always catches up with you. Deep down, you know what’s real and what’s fake. Living with lies slowly eats away at you. We’re competitive beings. Winning feels amazing, and many of us will go to great lengths to achieve it. The same goes for being admired and liked. But as Ryan Holiday put it: “The competitive drive is what motivates an athlete, but to cheat, or to hurt an opponent in order to win is to miss the point. It’s easy to get caught up in the pursuit of glory, but the real test lies in how we act when no one else is watching, when the stakes are high, and when the choices are difficult.”
Remember: being the best while being untruthful isn’t admirable. What truly matters is being honest—with yourself and with others. The next time you catch yourself in a quiet moment, ask: Would I be proud if someone saw this? That answer is where your true character lives.
Take care.